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Politics (formerly Election 2012)

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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Passionario » Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:51 pm

...
Last edited by Passionario on Fri Apr 19, 2013 11:18 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fivelives » Fri Apr 19, 2013 6:13 pm

If they contest it, the proceeds of the auction go toward paying court costs and the remainder gets donated to a charity or something. Nobody profits.

Spousal abuse should always be a crime. Period. Whether it's man on woman, woman on man, or whatever, it's still abuse and should be treated no differently than child abuse.

How would people not be allowed to be wrong, Fridmarr? You mean as far as "I picked the wrong spouse"? If that's so, then there should be repercussions for that decision. If I'm driving down the road and take a wrong turn, I'm out the cost of gas plus time and wear & tear on my car to get back to where I'm supposed to be. If I pick the wrong answers on a test, I get a lower score on the test and could fail it. If I make the wrong investments, I could end up going bankrupt. Why should people get a free pass on the most important decisions in their life, when there are penalties in everything else for making the "wrong" choice?

Divorce as it currently stands is far easier than just sacking up and fixing your relationship. To me it shows a lack of maturity, a lack of problem-solving skills, and a lack of ability to compromise. Not to mention a lack of ability to keep one's given word. Why should there be no repercussions for that?
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Klaudandus » Fri Apr 19, 2013 7:18 pm

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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Passionario » Fri Apr 19, 2013 11:24 pm

Fiveslives, have you ever been divorced yourself?

I'm curious as to how you arrived at the conclusion that it's an easy and painless choice free of any repercussions (as opposed to being a highly traumatic event that will leave its mark on you forever).
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fridmarr » Fri Apr 19, 2013 11:25 pm

Fivelives wrote:Spousal abuse should always be a crime. Period. Whether it's man on woman, woman on man, or whatever, it's still abuse and should be treated no differently than child abuse.

There are different types of abuse, you can be abusive to anyone and it's not a crime. In fact, you are free to be abusive, it's protected by the first amendment. That's pretty obvious.

Fivelives wrote:How would people not be allowed to be wrong, Fridmarr? You mean as far as "I picked the wrong spouse"? If that's so, then there should be repercussions for that decision. If I'm driving down the road and take a wrong turn, I'm out the cost of gas plus time and wear & tear on my car to get back to where I'm supposed to be. If I pick the wrong answers on a test, I get a lower score on the test and could fail it. If I make the wrong investments, I could end up going bankrupt. Why should people get a free pass on the most important decisions in their life, when there are penalties in everything else for making the "wrong" choice?


...are you even hearing yourself? You just suggested that the cost of gas, plus time and wear on your freaking tires after making a wrong turn while driving, is more of a consequence than what someone endures in picking the wrong spouse and having their marriage fail. Exactly how do you think failed marriages manifest themselves? They aren't happy times, they aren't without significant amounts of stress and consequence. They sure as heck are a lot more painful than a mile of extra gas and worn tread on a tire... I don't know how you got the idea that people getting divorced have managed to bypass all the consequences of picking the wrong spouse and having their marriage fail, but that notion is rather poorly thought out.

Wrong choices have consequences and a failed marriage tends to have some of the biggest that people will encounter in their lives. We do not punish people most of the wrong decisions that they make, beyond the natural consequences of those decisions. I don't see any particular logic in adding a punishment to divorce, particularly something so over the top like taking away everything that they earned. I mean we don't do that to the worst criminals among us.

Fivelives wrote:Divorce as it currently stands is far easier than just sacking up and fixing your relationship. To me it shows a lack of maturity, a lack of problem-solving skills, and a lack of ability to compromise. Not to mention a lack of ability to keep one's given word. Why should there be no repercussions for that?
Well no kidding. I mean, if they thought that they could reasonably fix the relationship, they probably wouldn't be getting divorced. As I pointed out, there are plenty of repercussions to having a marriage fail. This whole train of thought is just entirely illogical.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fivelives » Sat Apr 20, 2013 7:11 am

I'm a widower.

Fridmarr, I'm not saying to take away everything they earned, but that if they can't make an amicable division of goods then there should be a repercussion - and I suggested that any contested items are the ones vulnerable. I also mentioned bad investments and bankruptcy, which is pretty much on a par with divorce (at least in terms of impact on your life).

As far as abuse, it has to be proven and should be a matter for criminal courts, not civil ones. There have been thousands of proven cases of spousal abuse - verbal, emotional, and physical - and if someone is convicted of spousal abuse, then they should go to jail and their spouse should get all the joint assets.

Bankruptcy actually has far more effects on your life than divorce does: you can't get a loan for a home, business, or car (at least not at anything other than rates that would make a usurer vomit. When I started rebuilding my credit after the military, I took out a car loan at 29.99% APR for 14 months). You can't get any sort of line of credit at all. You get turned down for a LOT of jobs outside low-paying low-skilled jobs (try working at a bank with a bankruptcy on your credit. They'll laugh at you and toss you out on your ear). You can't open credit union accounts, etc. A bankruptcy pretty much puts a 7 year hold on your life, not to mention the seizing of assets in the process itself. I mentioned making wrong turns and getting test answers wrong as part of the "every mistake we make has consequences".

Failed marriages have none of those consequences, barring the division of jointly held debt in the divorce proceeding itself, which may lead to bankruptcy. There isn't even any kind of real social stigma attached to it at all anymore, and people who have had 3, 4, or even as many as 6 spouses are actually celebrated in some circles.

So what repercussions are you talking about?
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fridmarr » Sat Apr 20, 2013 10:24 am

Everything can be contested in a divorce, a person's entire livelihood, from all their current assets to even their future assets, not to mention their relationship with their children.

No, all abuse is not a crime. Only very specific kinds are criminal, it's not illegal to be a dick.

Please don't take one example and make it the rule. I know several people who have declared bankruptcy that for whom it had minimal impact aside from clearing their debts. I know people who have been divorced for whom the entire process was brutal, from the effects of the failed marriage itself, to their children, to the financial fallout, (divorce can be quite expensive for all involved) to their post divorce relationships. Either situation can be very traumatic, of course the repercussions aren't identical between divorce and bankruptcy because they are two totally different things, but its crazy to suggest that divorce is less significant.

This idea that a failed marriage has no repercussions is lunacy.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fivelives » Sat Apr 20, 2013 12:32 pm

Bankruptcy still wrecks your credit until it drops off your credit report. That takes 7 years.

All abuse should be a crime. There's a difference between just being a dick and being abusive.

If everything is contested in a divorce, then that would be the nuclear option, no? If Mr. Smith can contest everything, then so can Mrs. Smith. Then nobody wins, so it wouldn't be too likely and it would've achieved the purpose of having a more amicable split which takes less time and resources.

Either way, I admit the idea wouldn't work. It would be nice though, if people were penalized for divorce - might make them think twice about trying alternate solutions (like maybe, compromise and problem solving), and it also might make people think long and hard about whether or not they really want to spend the rest of their life with a person.

If people can't grow the hell up and act like adults, someone should smack them on the wrist and remind them that they should act their age.

Edit to add: Scratch the previous edit. I missed a paragraph there, my bad. Nyrgh. Fivelives requires sleep.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Klaudandus » Sat Apr 20, 2013 1:35 pm

Why do I have the feeling that if divorce is really hard to get, people would just kill their spouses...
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fridmarr » Sat Apr 20, 2013 1:56 pm

Fivelives wrote:Bankruptcy still wrecks your credit until it drops off your credit report. That takes 7 years.
Yes, but how much that affects someone depends on how much they need it. Really though, this line of logic is dumb. I'm not comparing bankruptcy and divorce, but merely acknowledging the incredibly obvious fact that a failed marriage has consequences that can be quite traumatic and troublesome.

Fivelives wrote:All abuse should be a crime. There's a difference between just being a dick and being abusive.
Look this isn't debatable. You can't make all abuse illegal, because people are allowed to say what they want, and that shouldn't change. A judge will acknowledge it in a divorce proceeding and deal with it accordingly, but no one will be charged with a crime. To that end though, what a person should be able to do is remove themselves from an abusive relationship without fear of a ridiculous punishment.

Fivelives wrote:If everything is contested in a divorce, then that would be the nuclear option, no? If Mr. Smith can contest everything, then so can Mrs. Smith. Then nobody wins, so it wouldn't be too likely and it would've achieved the purpose of having a more amicable split which takes less time and resources.

Either way, I admit the idea wouldn't work. It would be nice though, if people were penalized for divorce - might make them think twice about trying alternate solutions (like maybe, compromise and problem solving), and it also might make people think long and hard about whether or not they really want to spend the rest of their life with a person.
lol right, so one side can intimidate the other into not contesting anything by holding a nuclear option over their head...that's terrific.

I don't know what your perspective on marriage is, but pretty much everyone I know who is married or divorced thought about all those decisions pretty hard. Divorce is a penalty, it's one of the many potential consequences of a failed marriage.

I've had my say, I think my stance here is pretty obvious, so I'm done with this debate.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Klaudandus » Sat Apr 20, 2013 9:09 pm

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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Amirya » Mon Apr 22, 2013 4:12 pm

I'd actually be interested in hearing the compromise solution to some of the more common reasons for divorce.

I'm divorced, I got rid of my ex because he lied and cheated on me (then, afterwards, had the balls to cry to me because his mistress lied to him about being pregnant, but that's a whole different bitterness). What sort of compromise should I have accepted?
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Shoju » Tue Apr 23, 2013 6:27 am

Klaudandus wrote:http://www.boston.com/ae/radio/blog/2013/04/why_are_so_many_bostonians_telling_arkansas_state_senator_nate_bell_hes_an_idiot.html


I am planning to donate to his opponent. I don't live in Boston. I don't know anyone from Boston.

But I am a liberal leaning Gun Enthusiast in favor of rational gun control, who thinks that the best way to even remotely get these people to understand what we mean is to speak their language. Money.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Fivelives » Tue Apr 23, 2013 8:32 am

Amirya wrote:I'd actually be interested in hearing the compromise solution to some of the more common reasons for divorce.

I'm divorced, I got rid of my ex because he lied and cheated on me (then, afterwards, had the balls to cry to me because his mistress lied to him about being pregnant, but that's a whole different bitterness). What sort of compromise should I have accepted?


In the interest of not reigniting the debate on the board, PM'd.
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Re: Politics (formerly Election 2012)

Postby Klaudandus » Tue Apr 23, 2013 11:35 am

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